Today I find myself wanting to begin to touch the creative part of myself again. To express. To think. To analyze. To question. To learn.... and ultimately to grow and feel more alive. I have been shuffling along... physically... emotionally... spiritually... and I want to quicken my pace... step it up a notch or two... or three. At 48 years old I'm feeling like I need to start anew. I want to explore life and see where my passions are and pursue them. I want to matter ... and DO something that matters. I feel fulfilled... in my marriage, my home, my family (I have the most wonderful daughters on the planet) but I'm sensing a tug, that's getting stronger to pursue, reach out, expect more from myself... and not grow stagnant....
I feel as though I've been climbing uphill... a lot has happened in the last couple of months, no, couple of years.... no, 10 years.... okay yeah, my life has been slipping by. Things have occured that have zapped my strength and put me on "just put one foot in front of the other and keep on going" mode. Not so different from others I presume, but I'm feeling the desire to take better control and actually set the sails for a course. After all....
An optimist expects the wind; A pessimist complains about the wind; A realist adjusts the sails.
We'll see.
