Wednesday, September 11, 2013

thoughts about stress

Stress.  Yeah, I've had it.  I took care of my husband with cancer for almost four years only to watch him lose his life to the horrid disease.   I watched my mom take her last breath exactly one year later.  The two rocks in my life.... gone....  My oldest daughter struggles with addictions that I can't fix.   Some decided I wasn't good enough for them and rejected me for following my husband's wishes.   Faith?  I've struggled with that too.  What gave me peace for the last three decades is just not giving me the answers I need right now. 

But I have hope.  Because I am not going to give up the search.  I am getting there and will be all the stronger because of it.  Because of all of it.   Learning lessons that only adversity can teach.... I know God knows all and I have no regrets or guilt... so that gives me courage and hope... I lean on my friends and my family. ....  but I'm only human with limitations so I strive to gain the strength I need.

We all do. 

Funny (well, not really.)  So many of us today struggle with stress in our lives.  It's a tough world.  According to the American Psychological Association (APA) 77% of people regularly experience physical symptoms caused by stress.  That's a lot of folks! 

Today, while at a doctor's appointment, I talked to the nurse who administered a quick EKG of my heart.  As I told her the stresses in my life, she responded with understanding and began to tell me of the stresses in HER life.  I then became the compassionate listener as I heard of her losing a child six years ago.  She said she will sometimes turn on the news and hear of all the horrible things going on and feel a bit overwhelmed with it all..... 

Yup... We are all not that much different if we are honest with one another.  One man in the waiting room spoke to me a couple of times, almost yelling across the room at me stating.... "How's your blood pressure?"  and "Are you filling out all those forms?"   When I lifted my head to look at him, smiling, he then said that it gave him too much stress to answer all those questions!!   I told him I understood.  Honestly, there were about 8 pages of paperwork to fill out for this doctor's appointment.  Possibly a bit overwhelming for an 80-year-old man who came to his appointment holding a blood pressure monitor in his hands..... I wanted to give him a hug..... I see people differently than I used to....

Sometimes all we need is to have something tweaked health wise... some good advice.   And sometimes we just need someone to tell us we are okay and then somehow we are... and our symptoms vanish in time.  Of course sometimes it's serious and by being proactive we stop a catastrophe from occurring.

But most of the time the stresses in life pass and we deal with them and move forward as best we can.

1 comment:

  1. I could relate to this post. Sometimes stress just knocks us around a bit, doesn't it? My oldest son and his wife struggled for years with alcoholism. Beautiful children, good life - just either couldn't or didn't want to leave it alone. It broke my heart. But I'm here to say that you can never, never (did you hear me? NEVER) give up. Today my son and his wife are 1 year sober, and when I visited them in August I got to go to my son's AA meeting and meet his sponsor. He was so happy to have me go with him, and I was honored. Never give up on your daughter. Keep the door open.
    Edd's family? I don't understand people like that, but I know it hurts. You stood by your promises to Edd, and that's what matters. I know that the separation from him is hard. I like to view it as they're just around the corner out of sight. For now. But he is so close. And I know he's keeping tabs on you.
    Loneliness and sadness get in the way of faith, but don't give in to hopelessness. Not ever. There are answers out there, but you'll only find them through prayer and continual searching. Try to pray and learn as I'm sure Edd is still learning - kind of like doing your homework together. That's when you'll feel closest to him. Pray for guidance.
    Love is eternal - it never dies. Good luck, my friend, and keep your hope alive.