Sunday, July 24, 2016

some totally unrelated observations.... serious and not so serious

I would put myself in the "thoughtful observer" category. What I have observed lately is those who speak the loudest and agriest are often the ones who spread misleading information and don't check their facts. Defensive angry people have to win arguments to feel better about themselves. Much better it would be to feel secure in your beliefs yet not have to beat people over the head with them.

It was sad I felt I needed to walk away from a 20-year marriage many years ago. I was at a point of breakdown. Actually I did breakdown. But years later I don't feel bad anymore because I realize I was never fought for and neither was the marriage. I was replaced almost immediately. I have known people in my life who have said they loved me, but never fought for me. That's the only kind of love with meaning for me anymore.

Losing Edd is something I'll never really "get over" nor do I want to. I want to remember the pain. I want to remember the longing and the love and the passion, but I don't want the grief to cripple me. And it doesn't. 

It seems anything imaginable can be looked up on the Internet. And there is support for just about any point of view, so it's important to get the facts and research thoroughly... There is so much misinformation it makes my head spin. 

On the other hand, I saved so much money recently by researching DIY microderm abrasion facial treatments and made my own amazing product! So I'm glad that just about anything can be researched easily on the Internet.

I wish I could tell people, young women, not to give everything away so quickly to a man. Don't sell yourself short. Have healthy moral boundaries. Wait for a real commitment. Edd used to tell me I wasn't like all the women he knew. I was different and so he treated me differently. I would like to tell them to be the person that the guy actually wants to change for. To be the person he knows he must treat kindly and respectfully and lovingly and to really cherish. I felt that. And I'm so thankful. We would need that trust and loyalty, grace, respect, love and commitment for what was ahead. What a glorious ride was ours.

Among other chores I cleaned and purged my closet today. I have done a lot of volunteer work over the last four years....hospitals, library, Humane Society, Operation Turkey on Thanksgiving, animal rescue, etc ..... and I have (had) the T-shirts to prove it! 

Just some random thoughts today....

No comments:

Post a Comment