more grace

I let fear, impatience, and ungrace (ungracefulness) take me over for a while tonight.   Not just a little bit.  It kind of consumed me for a while.   It made me angry.  And put a veil over my eyes so I couldn't see anything else or find my way out of it.

Ungrace was me looking at what someone else had or what they were doing and feeling ungrateful for what I have.  It was not being thankful for my portion.  It was putting a label of unfair on how I'm being treated as I see someone receiving more.  Or what I perceive as more.

I read recently that it takes no grace to show love to someone just like me; it takes a lot of grace to show love toward someone of whom I disapprove.  I need to leave the judgment aspect to God.  

I am glad God is gracious toward ME though.  He has a soft spot for rebels.  He recruited people like the adulterer David, the whiner Jeremiah, the traitor Peter, and the human-rights abuser Saul.  I have come to know a God whose Son made prodigals the heroes of his stories and the trophies of his ministry. 

I don't believe I have to earn God's love.  And in dark times when I fail God badly or feel unloved I need not fear that God has stopped loving me.... as though He finally discovered the real truth about me.  He loves people because of who He IS, not because of who we are.

Phew...  I'm glad of that.



(some thoughts gleaned from "What's So Amazing About Grace by Philip Yancey)